L-I-V-I-N (finally)

Flashback to age 19 where adult life was beginning – normal 19 year old things: tumultuous relationship, slew of reckless decisions, know everything attitude, extreme dreams and still a ZEST for life.

Flashback to age 24 where adult life ACTUALLY began – following the timeline that society has placed on a “normal” 24 year old:  serious relationship, going through the same motions daily, staying and dealing with a job I hate, big purchases of vehicle & home, my light has dimmed and I was bored.

Now we arrive at age 29 where I am adulting and get a chance to start over and rejuvenate my life – going against the norm and rebelling against what society expected of me: doing what I want with my time, being completely independent (first time ever) and struggling, not settling, discovering new things often, and literally living life as I would like.

I am not a professional.  I have failed just as many times as I have been successful but I am lucky that everyone has let me fail and accepted me even post-failures.  Failures in relationships, failure in finances, failure in jobs, and failure in overall life choices.

With that being said, I feel more successful now after my MOST major fails than I ever have mostly because I learned how to be independent and how to have a voice.  Settling is something that society allows for us to do in life because of the “norms” (we even have a way that a “normal” woman looks, which is a whole other bullshit topic).  We can settle in all aspects of life (relationships, jobs, friends, cheap wine/Keystone light, etc).  But….

We are all extraordinary and unusual creatures which allows for us to all have remarkable relationships in life.  If we were the same, life would be boring. We should learn from one another – close friends, strangers, family members, and even children.  We don’t always choose to learn and embrace difference, rather we judge it and throw stones while we all live in glass houses.  Everyone is going to make decisions you don’t understand, live a way you won’t see fit, raise their kids in ways you may question, the list can go on but bottom line is it works for them and their life.

Are you bleeding?  Is it negatively effecting your life?  Is it something that is worth spending any of your precious time on? Is it any of your business?  The answers to those are 99.9% of the time, no.  So instead of worrying about others…

giphy

People will judge my life (I am totally guilty of  passing judgement, who isn’t? Be aware and WORK on it); then again, people will judge people and have been judging people for all of time but the best part of this is – I don’t care and neither should you.  I don’t care what people think or what people are whispering to others because my happiness is solely up to me, one hundred percent.  No one person or group of people can alter my happiness because that is found within/projected from within.  This lesson is the  hardest to learn and sometimes I falter, find myself getting a little dark – but as long as we are living, we are works-in-progress where we can only do our best.

Once I realized that judgement can’t alter my life, I decided to find what makes my fire stay burning and what makes me happy.  In finding our own happiness, there are some that are wounded along the way – some of those ties are forever severed, others are fixable and some you realize you don’t want to do anything with.  Keep people around that want to help you to keep dreaming and loving all things that life has to offer.  Passion in life is necessary and mediocrity should not even be an option.

By age 30,  I would like to be in the best place I have every been in my life.  I think that is a really attainable goal.  After reading millions of turning 30 blog posts/articles (obviously I had a little freak out about turning 30 earlier this year), a lot of them stated how life was really coming together by that age.  Stated above is partial proof.

2016 has taught me who is there for me, who I want to choose to be there for, how to (barely) survive on my own, how to live simply (no TV or computer), and how to let people in completely. 2016 literally taught me that life is so hard but so rewarding.

It also taught me that I should have listened to my girl LC so many years ago, so wise:

lauren-conrad-life-touch-get-a-helmet-4e633505-4ba2-4b22-9d83-2ee74838153b.gif

So, to anyone who takes time to read this, hopefully you can cheers to happiness & not dealing with mediocre anything in life – savor life, enjoy it and discover/learn something daily!

 

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